Category Archives: humor

Limits

George, to his teacher:

I have now integrated my preconceived ideas and the enlightenments engendered by yourself, but I still have trouble differentiating between “the limit of” and “the limits of”.

George’s teacher, aside:

I think George would be better off writing a novel. he could call it “The Limits of Continuity”.

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Filed under calculus, education, humor, language in math, teaching

“I did my best to pass the test”

I did the sums, no hesitation.
But then it asked for explanation.
“I know it’s right”, I wrote down fast,
“I understood from first to last!”.
“I’m going to be a mathematician,
“Not a fingernail technician!”.

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Filed under algebra, arithmetic, calculus, education, fractions, geometry, humor, verse

Infinity, a place beyond.

That most strange place, infinity,
Is somewhere I don’t want to be.
I’d rather stay with Brouwer
In his ivory tower.

 

and for something lighter try Heavy Man

 

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Filed under abstract, arithmetic, geometry, humor, language in math, verse

Lament to the Common Core geometry

Could I move this trapezoid
To that one, in the endless void?
I tried translation and rotation.
Then I had a crazy notion.
I would pass a rigid motion.
Result – a lovely hemorrhoid.

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Fractions, at home and away

In the morning Johnny’s mom
Said “Here’s six candies for your break.
“Give your sister half of them”.
Now Johnny’s brain is on the make.
He gives her one, and then another.
Little sister stamps her feet!
“And the last one!” says his mother.
“Damn” thinks Johnny, “I can’t cheat!”.

Later that day

“Johnny, what is half of six?”.
“I dunno”.
“Well, go get out six lego bricks
“And make a row.
“Now break the row right in the middle.
“That’s half the row.
“Just split the half and count the bricks”.
“I got three”.
“So now you see, three’s half of six”.
But does he know?

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Filed under arithmetic, fractions, humor, language in math, teaching, verse

Adding fractions

pizza fraction 2

When adding two fractions
Take care, delay your actions.
You must allow the whole
To exercise its role.

(Possibly and unwittingly owing something to Ogden Nash)

 

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Filed under arithmetic, fractions, humor, teaching, verse

“Number sentence”, what is this?

Being in complete agreement with  Dan Meyer on the term “Write an expression” I take exception to the vague instruction “Write a number sentence”.

Multiple choice question – Which of the following is a number sentence?

a) 3 + 2 = 5
b) three + two = five
c) three and two makes five
d) 2 + don’t know = 7
e) seven is 5 more than 2
f) they gave him 20 years
g) Mary gave three of her sweets to Jane and was left with 5
h) none of these, although they all have a verb

Answers on a postcard please, addressed to Santa Claus, North Pole

and next time I have much to say about “equations”

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Filed under algebra, arithmetic, humor, language in math

Motherhood now, or should I study math first?

It’s doggerel time again, this time with apologies to Harry Graham, who apparently didn’t write the original “Oh mama dear, what is that mess ……”.  See  allpoetry

         “Oh Mommy dear, what are these sums you can’t do anymore?”
      “Hush,hush my child, just do your best, It’s called the Common Core.”

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Filed under humor, language in math, Uncategorized, verse

Additional Subtraction

Not many do!!!!

Line Of The Week

pi“I don’t math.”

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Filed under algebra, humor, language in math, Uncategorized

Math takes a vacation. Hello real world.

This came to me as I was having lunch today:

fish_dinner_large with health warning and text3

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Filed under geometry, humor, Uncategorized